Dream big, Start small

One of the things I always feel is necessary is reflection. What is working well? What would I do differently? What steps do I need to take to change that? So, the other night, my husband and I sat down and tried to do a little of just that.

And yes.... it is in crayon. Partly because I needed the color visualization to organize my own thoughts, and also partly because there is something liberating about using crayon. It is not so...stiff. This is no time for legal pads and ball point pens! This is LIFE baby, and LIFE is in COLOR!!

We discussed money mostly. But we also branched out into personal goals, home goals, and family goals. We had a very rocky start at first, by jumping ahead of ourselves. But I sincerely think the key to any type of goal setting is creating a 'norm' that nothing is off the table. Anything is possible when you start. Want to lose 80 lbs? Great! Write that down. When you come back to it later, you can determine how realistic these things are, but for now, just get the thoughts out of your head!

So, we did that. We came up with about seven goals. Our first being about money. Before I continue, I am not saying that this is THE most important goal, but it is the one stressing us out the most at the moment. We brainstormed ideas of how to save, cut cost, coupon, share the work of saving, keep each other in check... we covered a lot.

Let's just say we, like a lot of America, are in debt.... big debt. Certainly not as big as some, but far more than we are comfortable having. We currently rent, which is painfully sucking us dry. While we may not have the "debt" of a mortgage, we also have nothing to accrue value. So, we are paying a bunch of money for something temporary. Originally, we did not buy because we didn't want to be tied down to a house in a place we were not happy in. But, more on that later. We also have debt from before our marriage that is haunting us to this day. Whether it was irresponsible spending, or just situational expenses, it's all there,...staring at us.

So, GOAL1: Pay off debt
Action Steps: 1. Tally up and assess ALL debt. So credit cards, car, old school stuff, whatever we owe. Figure out what is manageable for the next 5 years. (We think, we can get it all done in that time.)
2. Work on spending less. Look at NEEDS vs. WANTS, coupon all the time, plan meals out to prevent eating out, pay closer attention to our budget!
3. Prioritize the debt! We figured out that paying as we are now, we will finish the car first. So, we will focus on that. Will getting rid of that first save us anything? Not really. But it is attainable, and that is a big part about setting goals. If you feel you cannot get to where you want to be, you won't take the steps to try.

On my "What's cookin'" page, I plan on posting some of our money-saving meals that we use. I like to cook experimentally a lot, so hopefully, we can share ideas. :-)

Step 1

Step 1: Don't be afraid to ask for help!

Rarely are we ever really alone in our wants and desires. Only once every blue moon are we having a truly original problem. Throughout my pregnancy, I kept reminding myself that millions of women do this everyday. "I am not the first, and surely will not be the last." If you have been pregnant before, or even been near someone who was, you probably understand that mantra very well. For those of you who have not experienced that aspect of life, allow me to explain: Pregnant women worry about everything. Will the baby flip at the right time? Will labor be painful? Can I follow my birth plan? (Yep, you read right: birth plan) What if the doctor messed something up? How will we afford this?--Pregnancy brings about all kinds of worries that seem silly to the outsider, but very real to the woman going through it all. I just had to keep breathing and reminding myself that this was not the ONLY time my doctor had seen a baby. And yes, there were a couple of trips to the E.R. that may have been unnecessary, but at the time, nothing felt more urgent.

So, I told you that story because at the moment, I feel very much like my problems are overwhelming and isolating. (Very similar to pregnancy) But, the reality is; they aren't. I am having the same set of issues the rest of America is having. We are all in this one together, and I am guessing I am not the only one who feels alone. The economy is having issues, no one but the all-ready-wealthy seem to be getting anywhere, and we are embroiled in such a strange social and moral quagmire that it is confusing everywhere you turn. But more on that later...maybe.

As this year and a half since my pregnancy has gone by, I have found a lot of things I would like to do differently....and I have not changed a single one. So I guess that is what this blog is about. I am working toward setting smaller goals, in order to achieve larger ones.

Step 1: Don't be afraid to ask for help. We are in this together. And sometimes, "help" just means having someone listen, give advice, or maybe even some expertise. Asking for help requires a serving of humility. It is really difficult to let go of one's pride and simply ask for something you need. It is also hard to accept that someone just might be better at solving these things than you. We all want that accomplishment of 'figuring it out' but oftentimes we are blindly running into a brick wall, and simply frustrating ourselves.

Lately, my method of "asking" has been research. I am looking around to see what others are doing who have similar issues to mine. (I will outline those issues at a later time, but for now, general is best.) Pinterest has been a great resource for me. I have found so many creative ideas and a lot of links to information that has been very helpful. Unfortunately, that is not enough (can you imagine if it were?), and I am now also seeking support through this blog. And maybe, just maybe, I can offer some support as well.